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Funkier Than A Mosquito's Tweeter

How to stop struggling with control, and Nina Simone

Every day we "log on" to something new that pulls our thoughts and feelings away from being steady, clear, and settled. Words like"information overload" or "vicarious trauma" are par for the course these days. Everywhere we look seems to be more "solutions" that place us in a deeper and more challenging relationship with who we are, and how we show up in the world. Often, when I work in sessions with folks what comes up is a desire to either have control over their own life, or the outcomes of their actions. It is unsurprising that we should have a difficult relationship with "control" because we are socialized and educated to seek control over circumstances with the promise of having more happiness, success, and status. The reality is that no matter how much we want to change circumstances, if we don't take responsibility for our thoughts and feelings, we have very little capacity to influence real change.

Here are some ideas about how to stop struggling with control:


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